Last night, at about six o'clock, I believe I hit my wall. I think I finally reached the point where I was so tired of talking on the phone, having the same conversation eighteen thousand times (slight exaggeration, but whatever), that I said to the kids "Want to go on an adventure?" Now, adventures in my book are awesome possum. They only come when I have the inspiration to do so, but they are the moments when we get in the car, see where our curiosities take us, and revel in the excitement of the moment. "Adventures" are one of my most favorite experiences.
So at the time of day when I'm usually winding down and preparing the kiddos for sleep, we piled into our minivan and drove. We listened to music and sang our hearts out. Lolli finally popped up and said, "Hey guys! Why don't we talk about Daddy?" Now, I am a sucker for any sort of conversation that involved the lobster, so we turned the music off, and started talking. I said, "Lolli, how do you want to talk about Daddy?" She said, "Why don't you tell us things about him?" This then was proceeded by a half an hour of our four children asking me all sorts of things about the lobster, and me answering them. It was incredibly uplifting. Talking about him lifts my spirits, it takes me to a completely different mental plane. He is just that good.
We inevitably ended up shopping. I realize this is a complete female stereotype, however, if you know me you realize that I fall in to almost none of the female typical stereotypes. I hate shopping. I knew the situation was about to be forced upon me, when my last pair of jeans finally gave under the thread barren pressure of having been worn for a lot of years and tore. I needed some new clothes. We saw a sale sign and headed in. Walked out with two new pairs of pants for me and some tops that are not, wait for it.... polo shirts. I went through a weird polo shirt addiction phase. I despise shopping so much that when I find something that semi looks decent on me, I go crazy with it and get it in every single color. This is how I have avoided stores for long periods of time.
This morning I woke up and decided that FRGness was going to wait. I just wasn't feeling it. So the phone calls were sent to voicemail, and the emails were not answered. What did I do instead? Make a rug! Seriously. Instead of FRGing, I literally made a rug. Pretty cool, if you ask me. It just goes to show how much of my "happy" time FRGing takes up, and how much I need to learn to say "no, I'm not doing this today." My problem is that I am a workaholic to the core. I think I developed that aspect of myself when medical school was my central focus. It's virtually impossible to be a surgeon without a workaholic mentality. You just won't be able to cut it (yes, pun intended...lol).
Tonight we had a meeting and I wore my new clothes. I kid you not, eight people came up to me and said, "Look at you! You look nice!" I was like, WUH! Do I normally look hideous!? Okay people. I get it. Yes, yes I did. Way too many polo shirts. Way too little focus on appearance. Not that one must be vain, but I want the lobster to know that he is married to a woman who values his opinion of her. I know the lobster thinks I'm gorgeous. I know he is crazy about me. I guess I've allowed myself to be too lazy for too long. So, I'm trying to get some outfits together, make myself more comfortable with this fashion stuff. I want the lobster to come home to a woman who looks put together, not awkwardly dressed up.
Can you dig it? :)
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