Him

He has the greatest mouth. I mean really. His lips are perfect. They are amazing to kiss. His smile lights up the room and my whole heart with it. With his mouth he says the most beautiful of words. With his mouth he whispers things in my ear, when he thinks I'm asleep. His breath on my skin gives me goosebumps every time.

His eyes are the most beautiful of all browns. I have often joked that he has to be blind because he seems to see something so beautiful in me. I truly don't know what he sees when he looks at me...but I know, I know that those eyes are madly in love with me. I know it even when he is angry. I know it when he is sad. I know it when he is elated. His eyes love me more than his mouth is capable of saying.

His heart is magnificent. Even now as I sit here I can almost play it off for you. I know how it feels when it beats under my ear as I lie on his chest. I know its sounds. I know the experience of being completely, truly, deeply, and passionately loved by it. I also know the experience of being the cause of its brokenness.

His hair is black, even though he still hopes it's brown. I loved how each month new pepper specks seem to pop up. I love finding it on our bathroom sink in the morning. I hate when it isn't there anymore. Truth be told, I am terrified of the day when it isn't there anymore. It's funny how bathrooms can become like a ghost town when a man leaves his wife. The bathroom becomes the epitome of all that is missing: toothbrush, deodorant, razor, hair, towel...

His voice plays over and over again in my mind. When I sleep I hear it and when I wake up I search for it. It's almost like a ghost that follows me around, comforting and terrorizing, and heart breaking all day and all night. I am so afraid of forgetting that sound. Yet, with each passing day, the memories become more fuzzy so that it gets to a point where I begin to wonder how far from reality my memory really is...His is the voice that has the ability to instantly enrage me, and instantly calm me. He can make me laugh with few words. His voice is my greatest comfort, second only to his touch.

His touch is like pieces of heaven. It encompasses all of the abilities to nourish, rejuvenate, and empower me. He relaxes me with one touch. He instantly changes my intensity with one gentle placement of his hand...on the small of my back, or on my leg. Those two places just make me go to this place in my mind where I realize all will be well and life will go on.

Oh God how I don't want to forget. I don't want to forget these things!