Memorial Day

This Monday, May 28, 2012 is Memorial Day. It is a sad day. It is a powerful day. It is an emotional day. It isn't about an extra day off of work. It's not about sleeping in or getting drunk. It is not about deployed soldiers, or lonely families waiting for their return. It is not about the work my husband does on a daily basis, or the many millions of minutes that I have spent away from him. It is not Veteran's Day.

Memorial Day is the one day a year that we Americans honor and remember the dead soldiers. It's a harsh thing to read isn't it? It's a harsh reality. It is the one day a year that this nation sets aside to say: We recognize what you gave up, because we asked you to. We realize your family misses you. You made an impact. Your life was valuable. Your memory is powerful. Your absence is noticed. We are thankful.

I find it disturbing that is happening less and less. I find it heart breaking that I open up my facebook page and see so many comments about people missing their deployed husband, or thanking all military. While those sentiments are true, and beautiful, it's not what Memorial Day is about. Don't let the reality of this day be lost on you. Don't let the reality of the agony that this day holds be forgotten.

For some families, this Memorial Day is their first with their soldier dead. It's the first where this day means something so much deeper and more powerful than road trips and vacations. It's the first where they know that their soldier won't be coming home, and won't be calling. There won't be any more text messages or emails. There won't be any more dinners together, or new family pictures to put up on the wall.

For other families, this Memorial Day is one in a long line of many that they have experienced with their soldier in Heaven. This day is another reminder that they've somehow managed to make it through another year without him. For some it's a scary thought: the memories are beginning to fade, and it seems like the people are beginning to talk about him less and less...

For me, there will be alcohol involved. It's tradition. In our world we have a moment of silence, followed by a raising of a glass in their honor. For me, Memorial Day is a day for Y, O, S, B and all of their wives, children, parents, and family members. It is a day when I remember their loss, when I remember the ache that their families carry every day. It is a day when I remember their silliness, their seriousness, their light. It is a day when I hold their families up in my heart and my mind and I pray. I pray for comfort. I pray for healing. I pray for the tears to be wiped away and for joy to be renewed. I pray for this nation to never forget them. I pray for this one day to always be theirs.

To our friends in Heaven, may you always know how important you were to us. May your families always know how grateful we are for this sacrifice. May we always take care of those you've left behind. May we always be praying, until there are no more soldiers joining you in Heaven because of war.