I have recently been blessed with people in my life who have encouraged me to garden. I live in brownsville. That my read like a joke, but it really is quite factual. The "grass" is brown. The cacti are brown. The rocks are brown, and on and on and on. I believe there is a psychological need for green, and that I wholeheartedly have it. It's amazing what a monochromatic scheme does to one's psyche. It squashes the spirit, sucks your heart dry, and then wonders why you're not "content". It's not that I don't enjoy the color brown. I'm not in that club of "brown sucks", it's just that my eyeballs, my spirit, my soul needs more than just that. So I have begun a "garden".
The truth is that I should tell you how this gardening view came to be. Nearly four months ago, my children and I, as part of our homeschool, planted some seeds in a greenhouse kit. We paid attention to them for a couple of weeks and had the best of intentions. But we all ended up really sick and forgot all about it. I peeked through the lid randomly and saw they were all dead. I set it aside (WHY DID I SET THIS ASIDE!?!?!?!) and left it. Three months later, I was cleaning my home and realized this didn't get thrown away. I took off the lid and one plant was STILL ALIVE! That's right my friends... this one plant was a fighter and I determined to give him a chance. I brought him out into the fresh air and started to water him. He kept growing. I sort of fell in love with this fella. My little cilantro plant that has the ultimate fighting spirit, had won my heart. This is how I fell into having a "garden"...
I now have some indoor plants (almost all edibles because we have rabbits up the wazoo and frankly I don't want my hard work to feed rabbits... I'm selfish like that), and I'm working on a porch garden. Yes, I can collectively hear you all say Porch garden? HUH!? But the simple fact is this: I do not own my home. I am not allowed to landscape or change the yard of my home. Everything I grow must be in pots.
It has only been a few days of "green" being back in my life, but it's already feeding me. I want to be outside again. I want to get up and check on the fruits, vegetables, flowers... I feel excited when I see a bee buzzing around and I find my brain internally cheering them on and begging them to come and hang out at my house forever. I no longer have a passionate hatred for the ants that are all over my yard because ants dig tunnels. Tunnels aerate the soil, and that helps things to grow! I'm not eager to leap up and bug spray my whole yard because now I'm thinking about what killing off an entire yard of creatures will do to the soil, to the earth, to the birds, to the environment... How will the ripple effect of that one action play out?
The biggest lesson that this garden has been teaching me (again... it's only been a few days!) is patience. The value of patience, persistence, and hard work. There is very little instant gratification. There is SOME instant gratification (like: yes! I did this! Looks better than before!) but the overall "vision" I have in my mind will not come over night. I have to wait...
What a concept... waiting. I have such an instant gratification type of personality. I want things and I want them now and I'm not interested in waiting around for things to come. But my spirit/psyche/mind, like my garden, is a work in progress. I can't instantly change everything I dislike about me. I can work the ground, till the soil, get my hands dirty, make a mess, and then clean it all up and see what happens as I'm watered, fed, and put out in the sun.
I wonder what these gardens will look like a week, month, or even a year from now. I wonder how we both will grow and change. Can't wait to see. :)
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